Sweet Nothings

Bug:  Hey, Spider. 

Spider:  Yes, Bug?

Bug:  Want to know a secret?

Spider: What?

Bug:  I like to eat your poop.

Spider:  That's why I don't cover it up in the kitty box. 

Click to Enter Hop

Yo Ho Ho And A Bottle Of Rum! Pirate Party And Blog Hop!

Ahoy, Maties!

My handsome nephew of the lagomorph persuasion is having a Pirate Party and Blog Hop to celebrate his recovery from an eyeball-ectomy! His co-host and co-guest of honor is the lovely and lionhearted lionhead princess, Maddy Bunny! She survived being filleted like a codfish to have an abscess the size of a grapefruit removed from her abdominal cavity. She almost died, but we prayed and prayed for her, and Jesus made her all better cuz He has a soft spot in His heart for bunnies (it's in the bible if you look hard enough and know what to look for)!!

My own bunnies would straight-up kill me for dressing them up, but Bug and Spider are ready to Walk The Plank with Speedy and Friends!

I got rum in me guts, and saltwater in me veins, ye landlubbers!

Mom: Bugbug, is that blood on your dirk?

Bug: Yes, mama. 

Mom: What happened babygirl?

Bug: The scurvy dogs were gonna make me walk the plank! 

Mom: It's just a party, my sugar. I am sure it was all in good fun.

Bug: I know, mama, but the water was cold!!

Mr. Bubbles: Everyone should know better than to mess with a chihuahua! Come cuddle with your ole pappa bear under the blankies, babygirl! Wait...give mama that bloody dirk first...

Well, I guess with all that rum and grog getting passed around, there was bound to be a few fights and some bloodshed! It IS a pirate party after all...

Sorry, Rachel! I will help you clean up the blood and guts and vomit after the party! 

Friday Flash Fiction 55 - Ode to Stinky...or DON"T WASH MY BLANKIE

My Stinky Blankie
A Giant Hankie
I scootch my butt across your nap
You smell like grass
And my ass
And a bit like kitty crap

Stinky Blankie
My precious Stanky
Mom just put you in the wash
But when you dry
I will once again try
To stink you up, by golly by gosh

Bug likes her blankets like she likes her food. The stinkier, the better. 

Thank you, G-Man! You are the nicest smelling host from coast to coast. xoxoxox

The Spaghetti Sandwich - My New Food Blog

Y'all come by and check out my new food blog, The Spaghetti Sandwich. No politics, no hot button issues. Just food, fun, and love, all stir fried together and topped with chocolate sauce.
If you try any recipes, let me know. Also, if you want to post a recipe, let me know and you can guest post!
What got me wanting to start a food blog? Don't we crazy bunny people constantly talk about food? Well, there ya go. And with football season at hand, and the holidays coming up, and with colder weather headed our way, I am the mood for food!

Jackalopes, Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny

When I was a very small child, my mother had me convinced that Jackalopes (a crossbreed of jackrabbit and antelope,  or basically a jackrabbit with a rack) were real. I would scour the desert landscape for hours on our frequent long road trips between Texas and California in search of the elusive beast.  It does not help that gift shops and novelty stores across I-10 would have stuffed jackrabbits with racks attached to their heads, creatures not of nature but by some clever taxidermist's craft. I am also somewhat ashamed to admit that this delusion of mine continued well into my late teens. I was very disappointed when I realized the truth. I always knew there where no such persons as Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, or the Easter Bunny, but that the world did not have such a creature as the jackalope still pains me, an adult going into middle-aged years. 

So much cuter than a jackalope, eh! Rabbit Slaves know to be thankful that our little Headbutting Overlords do not grow horns! We would all have at least one broken ankle in our service careers to The Masters!

Friday Flash Fiction 55 - Schoolyard Diplomacy

USA:               I'm not touching you!

Russia:            Stop it!

USA:              Thtop it...

Russia:            Stop mocking me!

Israel:             Thtop mocking me...

Russia:           I'm stupid.

Israel:            You're thtupid...

UN:               I know you are but what am I?

Russia:           A fag!

UN:              Moron says what

China:           What?

Russia /
Israel:           Moron said what!!!

UK:             Hold your noses!!!

Syria:           I farted...

This very much looks like Syria, yeah? Sand and shit all over the place. 

Thank you, G-Man, for hosting!!!

Dang Ole Popcorn...and Cats...

I had what I believe to be a wicked sinus infection for a few months now. But this weekend, it got much worse, and I finally had to admit, it was a toothache. A nice hot cup of soup loosened up something around the gumline, and out comes a popcorn kernel. I still have to see my dentist today.
Why have you betrayed me, Popcorn? I have loved you above all other foods!

Here are some pictures of my parents' cats. Why? IDK. Cuz it's the intehwebs!

Toni Pickles (she is named after Tony Iommi, but I am not sure where the Pickles comes from. My dad named her) using DeeDee as a pillow, sleeping on my mother's quilt project (the pink thing) on their table. Mom got them a few weeks ago at the animal shelter. 

Beau.  This is his porn star pose. He poops big. Great big poops...Great big stinky poops...